Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Ladies and gentlemen of the universe,

I am writing this letter as a general memorandum to all those of you who choose to "speak" to God on Facebook.

What the fuck are you guys doing? Does God check Facebook? I don't think so. If he does, he sure as hell never comments on my posts. But anyway, lately I've been witness to several people "speaking" to God in posts and claiming to love Him and how they desperately need Him. They claim that He knows everything and that's what matters. First off, if you have faith and believe in it, then yes he does know everything, so your lame attempt to make yourself seem religious and innocent fails. Again, if you believe in God, yes, he knows everything, even that lie you're posting as your status for all the world to see. He can see right through you and knows your true intentions so please stop playing the victim. You're only digging yourself an even deeper grave.

Another thing, your drama has NOTHING to do with God. Your drama is between you and the person(s) you have beef with. Stop putting that shit out on Facebook to get a pity party going to make yourself feel better. All the people "feeling sorry" for you on there are also just doing it for themselves to cash in on favors in the future or just to get attention. ALSO, if you're friends with the person you're beefing with, UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD YOU POST THAT DRAMA ON FACEBOOK. They have access to it and can comment back to continue that argument online for everyone to see. On that note, please have some goddamn shame. Keep your problems to yourself. The more private you are, the more people will be able to tolerate you. No one likes a loud-mouth, annoying headcase. Keep your shit to yourself, and you'll be happier and people will actually stick their neck out to help you.

Again, just a general memo to all Facebook users. It was just a little observation I had made a while back and now recently saw a re-occurrence of it that bugged me. My blog IS for all these racy and unpopular statements and observations, so it's your fault if you read this and become offended. Remember, if you're offended, you're being a puss. "Life is a tragedy for those who feel, but a comedy for those who think." Understand this is my own opinion and is not being force-fed to anyone. If anyone chooses to accept what I say and agree with it, then more power to them. If you disagree, that's also fine with me. Everyone's got opinions and we're all entitled to them.

Sincerely,

Cees

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Roller Coaster

The metaphor of life being a roller coaster really is quite accurate.

Everyone starts at the same point. You all get on and go for the ride. There are the same ups and downs for everyone, but everyone experiences them in a different way.

Some people take the ups and downs pretty hard. They're either not used to it, or they have weak stomachs. Whatever the case may be, these people kick and scream the whole way down on every drop. In life, those are the whiners who can never get used to the bad parts of life. They can't handle them and so they complain.

Other people handle the ups and downs a lot better. They know they're there. They're experienced. They like the excitement of the ups and have a laugh on the downs. There's not throwing up, no crying, no moaning, no kicking and screaming. These people are the ones who are calloused to life. They've experienced enough to where they know the downs won't last forever and that the ups are just another part of the roller coaster that is life.

So why am I writing this?

I'm on one of the downs right now. I guess you can say I'm in between the experienced and the inexperienced. I don't kick and scream as much as the novices, but I'm not as calm and collected as the experts. I fall right in between. Occasionally I'll whine about things, but thankfully there's only three people on the ride with me so I'm not too embarrassed. Occasionally a person or two decide to sit away from me and let me ride front row alone while they enjoy the coaster from the middle or back.

Those three people are obviously always gonna be on that ride with me. I know they'll never get off and let me go completely alone. I KNOW THAT. It's a FACT. They're stuck on that ride with me. They may move to the front or back and leave me isolated, but I know they're still there. For that, I thank them. But when you're riding the coaster in the front, sometimes you can't help but feel like you're all alone on the ride and the panic sets.

Anyway, Korina, Mom, Karla: Stop riding in the fucking back and sit next to me goddamn it. I apologize if my stench moves you guys away from time to time, but don't move so far back.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

HOCKEY!!!!!!

So I've played about half of my rookie season at Silvercreek, and I JUST realized I can use this outlet to go over games and kind of explain what happened.

Soooo...

Starting next week, I will be doing just that. Tuesdays are gamedays so look for the recaps either late Tuesday nights or early Wednesday mornings. As of right now my team, Long Gone, is second in the league in the standings and in just about every statistical category. Personally, I am second in the league in assists and points, and first on my team in assists, second in goals, and second in penalty minutes.

We have a really good team. Our goalie is one of the top goalies in the league as far as I'm concerned. He manages to make those key saves to keep us in games and give us that little kick in the ass when we need it. He won't get beat too often on breakaways, partly because we're solid enough to not give any of those away.

Our defense is anchored by Slash and Greg, two stay-at-home defensemen who are good at communicating and covering for their respective partners on defense. Greg is the team's co-captain. Slash is the only right-handed defenseman on the team. On the other side of each pairing you have Tim, quite possibly our best skater on defense, and myself. Tim is a pure offensive defenseman who is also solid in his own end of the rink. He definitely takes a lot of risks jumping into the play, but luckily he's got Greg to hold down the fort for him. The thing with Tim is that because he knows he can skate by everyone, he ALWAYS shoots the puck and even if someone is open with a better opportunity to score, he won't pass the puck. As for myself, I'm more of a two-way defenseman, but I definitely chip in the points. I have scored a point in every game this season so that speaks to my offensive ability from the backend, but I can definitely defend the best the opposing team has to offer. I also have the speed to get back on defense which allows me to be as risky as I want on the offensive end. It definitely helps to have Slash holding down the fort.

Our forward group is also relatively good. We have a few standouts in Nelly, Jason, and Sia. Nelly and Sia would have to be considered our top forward group. Sia is a power forward who is strong and handles the puck well. Nelly is the shooter on that pairing. He has a good shot and he's smart enough to get into the open areas for Sia to find him. Jason is the stud forward on the team. He has excellent skating ability, puck-handling skills, and incredible hockey sense. It's amazing watching him out there skating circles around the opposing team. He can easily shake a defender out of his skates with one small skating move. The rest of our forward group consists of Sheri, Tony, Jon, G-Funk, and David. Sheri is the co-captain of the team and our most vocal player. Sheri and Jon are similar. They both battle hard, have great hockey sense, and can score some timely goals. Tony is one of the slower skaters, but he makes up for it with his hockey sense and ability to get to the front of the net for those garbage goals that every team needs. David and G-Funk are two forwards who can skate relatively well and provide plenty of energy up top wearing down the opposing team's defense by holding the puck in their end. Both have a bit of an edge to their game, and as such have each received two game suspensions. David served his earlier this season, and G-Funk has served the first of his two games.

Long Gone is the defending champion. The roster as it stands is the one that won the championship, with the exception of myself. I am the addition to this team, and hopefully I can help the team repeat as champions. Depending on how well we do this year, the team is looking forward to moving up into the next division.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Cheers, Mate.

I've been picking up on a fuck load of British slang terms lately. Thanks go out to Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant, and Karl Pilkington on The Ricky Gervais Show and The Ricky Gervais Guide To... Series. So just for those of you who might hear me talk sometime soon, I use a lotta their terms now so be careful. I don't use the accent, obviously. Only nappy cunts attempt to use the British accent when it isn't natural to them. So fuck off and hang yourself if you do this. And also, "'Ello Gov'na" is NOT the only thing Brits say. So once again, fuck off and stop being a filthy fucking slut. If I hear anyone say that, I will castrate them and feed them their shit.

That or I'll make them the end-piece on the Human Centipede.

LOL.

-Cesar

Monday, April 11, 2011

Dodgers - Giants

If I hear that any Dodger fan was beat at AT&T Park tonight, I'm gonna be pissed with the "classy" San Francisco fans. No doubt the shameless idiots at Dodger Stadium who beat that Giants fan should have been aborted before birth, or at least sat on right after being shat out, but having a fan base call ALL Dodger fans the worst in sports, and then retaliating is unacceptable. It drops them below those idiots who did the same thing in LA. Let's keep it civil and just enjoy A GAME. That's all it is in the end. Sure, a little verbal rousing is okay, but let's leave it at that. Anything that escalates past that is not cool.


To end this post, LET'S GO DODGERS

Friday, February 11, 2011

...You Might Be A Racist.

I have never understood why people feel racism. I understand what people consider to be racist, but I don't understand why people are so offended by it. Pride plays a big part in it, I guess, but if people are proud, why not be proud of something they made for themselves? Why feel pride for something they were born into? No one chooses to be either Mexican, American, British, Russian, Muslim, etc. Pride in one's ethnicity, one's ancestry is respectable. Pride to the point of being offended by statements or actions is quite honestly absurd. Like I said, be proud of something you do yourself, something you make for YOURSELF, not an identifier such as where you or your family are from. /end rant.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

That Kind Of Day...

Not really day, more like the mood I'm currently in. Oh well. Shit happens.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Bunionectomy

I have an appointment tomorrow morning to see my doctor to schedule my left foot bunionectomy. I had my right foot done December of 2009. I'm planning on getting my left foot done within two weeks. These videos are a great example of ignorance being bliss. Five minutes ago I didn't care what happened and I was ready to have the surgery tonight if possible. I started watching the first one and I couldn't get through a minute of it, and that's saying something because I tend to have a very strong stomach. Nothing grosses me out. Except this, obviously. So check them out, if you dare. It's all in real time, so it shows the entire procedure. Oh. Dear. Sweet. Fucking. Baby. Jesus (in Spanish).



Part 1



Part 2


Part 3

Monday, January 24, 2011

Apologies

Jupiter's Cock! I've been away for far too long. I took a whole month off from blogging for all 4 of you that tune into this blog. Apologies. Just a quick recap of what's taken place since the last post, I had a good Christmas, New Year, Birthday, Snow Trip, Bar Hopping, and everything has been really fun. I rewatched Spartacus last week so that I could catch up for the new season (Gods of the Arena) which aired this past friday. Please check it out on Netflix. Spartacus: Blood and Sand is an AMAZING series. I've even taken to cursing just like the characters on the show. Anyway, I've gotta run now, but please check it out.

-Cesartacus